There is this thing on Facebook where it pops up memories of previous years. I love it actually, I ponder over who or what that status was about, or smile at old photos I have shared.
But last week it helpfully reminded me that I was crap at pottery!
A good few years ago I booked a pottery course for my Mum, for her birthday, or Mother's Day... or something, and I decided to go along with her.
Straight away I realised the error of my ways as the clay made my hands dirty, and I don't care much for dirty hands. I can just about cope with glue, but chalky, grey clay... ummm, no thank you.
But I had paid, so I gave myself a stern talking to and got to work, being creative.
Now, as I worked with beads back then, and as I mess about melting glass, I decided to experiment to see what would happen mixing the two mediums.
I made a clay frame butterfly shape thing, with segments to fill with glass seed beads.
Ok, so far so good, nice and colourful, should make an interesting wall hanging when fired...
..... or not!
Not quite the effect I had in mind, but hey, that's what experimenting is all about. It might have been a masterpiece, you just never know.
Scrap that then, lets make something that looks like fabric instead. How about a denim vase, complete with stitching and pockets. (bear in mind that everyone else was making "normal" stuff, like plates and bowls).
Ok, so was happy with the form.
Still looking passable with the glaze on.
Hmmmmm, crap again. Into the scrap pile.
It was then suggested that I make a pot, like other people were making pots. A coil technique pot, where it is built up from coils of clay, smoothed into place. I'm quite chuffed at this point, it's talking to me. It's saying.....
...GIVE ME BOOBS!
Yeah, ok, I know. I am slightly odd.
I also made her (as she is now obviously a 'her') and bung for her head. I decided she was going to be a money pot and needed a head.
I added some splodges of glaze. Still unsure where I was going with this.
Voila! Please, don't bother to comment, I have heard them all, trust me!
But the bung would come in handy if I ever needed a weapon, it was solid!
My son, Iain, trying not to smirk as I made him hold my "goddess" for a photo to show her size.
(She's now gone back to the ground)
My final ditch attempt, after the 10 weeks or so were up, was to knuckle down and make something that actually looked like something.
The conversation with the Tutor went something like this...
TUTOR: What are you making now Sue?
ME: A lidded pot, but it's crap, as usual.
TUTOR: I think it's really good, it really does look like a crap.
ME: It's supposed to be a cupcake.
And to prove a point I put a cherry on the top.
The only things I could actually say that I was even the tiniest bit please with was my pendants and charms that I made on the first day. Maybe I just need to work smaller, or maybe I should just leave the clay in a dark room out of my reach ;)